MONK MODE.

Attitude of gratitude

I read somewhere that the same part of the brain that is used to process anxiety is also used to process gratitude (the limbic system and prefrontal cortex). Therefore, it’s actually impossible to be grateful and anxious at the same time. And when you think about it, it makes perfect sense right? Think back to a time when you were really grateful for everything that had happened to you or you were truly thankful for the life that you have. Hopefully for most of you, you won’t have to think too hard. Maybe you were having a really good day? Maybe something amazing happened to you…you completed a tough project, you got that new job you were gunning for, you aced that presentation, you scored the winning shot in the big game, you bought a house, you met someone that changed your life, you became a parent. I bet that when you were feeling this way, you weren’t sad, you weren’t feeling down or unhappy. You weren’t thinking negatively.

Like I said in Part 1 of this article, it is harder to conquer the mind than it is to conquer the body, but when you can, your life will change dramatically. When you have an attitude of gratitude, you begin to think about all the amazing things you have in your life instead of wishing for all the things you don’t have. You stop comparing yourself to other people. You stop caring that other people think. You begin to live and love your own life.

How can I develop an attitude of gratitude? Honestly, it’s a lot easier than you think. You want to appreciate your life more? Simply turn on the news and see what’s going on around the world. Go visit a hospital or a charity organisation. Walk past someone in a wheelchair or someone who has lost a limb(s). Walk past a homeless person. Think about a loved one who is currently severely ill or had passed away too soon…

We all could have easily been born into any time or era in human history, and in any country, yet we are all here in 2026 living in a first world country (I assume you are if you have access to my website and social media!) with all our basic needs and then some met. What a time to be alive. How lucky am I? How lucky are we all!?

If you find this mindset difficult, schedule a bit of gratitude into each day. It may sound weird, but put an alarm on your phone to remind you to pause and think about everything that you have to be thankful for. Try doing this first thing in the morning when you wake up and your feet touch the ground. Make it a habit. Write down your thoughts if you have to. Happiness is only a mindset away…

Take a moment

Meditation is such an amazing technique to calm the mind and body. Technique you say? Aren’t you just sitting down and closing your eyes? Yes, to a basic degree, however people have spent their entire lives learning to meditate and I believe there is always room for improvement.

If meditation is a new concept for you, don’t let it overwhelm you. Meditation doesn’t have to be perfect. Simply find 5 or 10 minutes in your day (we all have that time to spare) to sit down comfortably in silence, close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing. Try and empty your mind and your breathing will slow down naturally. Don’t worry if your mind travels, simply bring your focus back to your breath each time.

Imagine you’re next to a highway. You’re not on the highway or driving a vehicle, you’re just sitting on a bench by the side of the road. The vehicles buzzing by are your thoughts and that’s ok, don’t expect to always see an empty road. You are simply watching your thoughts come and go. Every time you find yourself jumping into a car (your thoughts), simply get out and go straight back to the bench. The brain is like any muscle, the more you train it, the stronger it gets.

And don’t be hard on yourself. We are so used to living such busy lives with so many distractions that it can be hard to simply sit down for a moment, close our eyes and be quiet. However, meditation will make you a calmer person and less reactive to life in general. It will teach you to be at peace. It will teach you to stop trying to make your expectations match reality. Most importantly, it has the power to calm your life even when you aren’t meditating. Meditation makes life simple.

Try and be consistent. And if you end up fall asleep, it’s your body trying to tell you that you really needed a rest anyways!

“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone”.

– Blaise Pascal

Be your biggest fan

One of the best things I got from backpacking around the world in my mid 20’s was that I learnt how to enjoy my own company. Not only did I learn how to be by myself, but I also learnt how be comfortable within my own skin, meet and network with new people, and actually love myself. Unfortunately, a lot of people cannot say the same. Many people are so harsh on themselves. Judging themselves unfairly. Comparing themselves to other people. Always focused on their mistakes.

You know how in an emergency on a plane you are told to put the gas mask on yourself before you put it on your children? This is because you can’t put the mask on your children if you run out of oxygen yourself. So often, we concentrate on other people, especially if you’re a parent, to the point where you begin to neglect yourself. However, ironically the more you focus on yourself, the more others actually benefit.

I remember when I began my health journey, I thought I was actually being selfish. As I began to go to the gym or go out for runs consistently, I was out of the house more and spending less time with my family. However, when I was at home, I was a better person. I was happier, more energetic, more engaged and overall better to be around. I became a better husband and father by prioritising myself. It really is quality over quantity, everyone reaps the rewards.

So don’t forget about you. Don’t neglect your needs. Focus on your priorities more. Treat yourself kindly. Enjoy being alone. Don’t say things to yourself that you wouldn’t say to a close friend. Be your biggest cheerleader…you got this!

“We have two lives, and the second begins when we realise we only have one”.

– Confucius

When the world is fire and ice, wellbeing can be the balance you need.

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